Friday, 11 December 2015

Life's Rich Pattern

As anyone who reads my blog knows one way and another 2015 has been a tough year. I had hoped the year would just come quietly to an end, but instead it had a nasty sting in it’s tail.
Sadly Himself’s Mother died 3 weeks ago. Whilst she hadn’t exactly been in the pink of health this year, it was certainly not enough to even contemplate this, it was a completely unexpected shock.
So the last weeks have been busy with all the sad and difficult tasks you would expect. Made all the more challenging by the fact we are here in Oxford, Himself’s sister is in Torquay, his parents in Kent and not a car between us.
We are now back home, weary and sad, and in my case reflective. 
To pinch a phrase from the Queen I can safely say 2015 has been an Annus Horribilis for me. Being a glass half full type of person I’m optimistic that the worst has passed, but also I am realistic enough to know there is more to be done, more to be dealt with and always my family to support.
It’s there my biggest challenge lies. To put it simplistically my place in my family has always been ‘Little Miss Sunshine’. My role is to always be the sunny, positive and encouraging one. On the whole that’s not difficult, by nature it’s the kind of person I am. 
It is hard at times like this though, when I feel beaten down and all I want to do is crawl into my bed and sleep, or sit bawl my eyes out. Sometimes the supporters need some support.
But life goes on. 
I’m not exactly feeling festive, and as someone who usually flings herself headfirst into Christmas, it feels horribly forced this year.
We are visiting Dad with Mum, then going home with her for as long as she wants the company, she’s finding it hard to be on her own. 
We are also poised to flit down to Kent if needs be between Christmas and New Year.
So with all that it’s good to have some fun things to look forward too. We have a wedding to go to tomorrow which I’m really looking forward to being part of. I finally have my outfit picked out (as it’s a winter wedding it’s full on tartan for me!)
The Snoopy and Charlie Brown Movie is of course a must. 

It’s also the HUGE day in Himself’s life - Star Wars
We have tickets for the midnight showing in our local cinema and are guests at a special screening in London followed by a party courtesy of Cineworld. I’m not sure exactly how many times he will have seen the film between the 2 events but it could well be double figures…….    


  1. Oh, I am sorry to hear your news, sending much love to both of you.
    Enjoy every normal day you have, they do sadly become fewer as you get older. I thought of you when we drove past the advert for the Snoopy film earlier. xxxx

  2. So sorry to hear your news Gisele.
    Don't force yourself to enjoy xmas, it'll still be there next year. Hope you enjoy the wedding. x

  3. So sorry to hear your news. I hope things improve for you next year.


  4. Thinking of you both, hope that you manage to enjoy the wedding - if that's not a symbol of how life goes on I don't know what is. So sorry for your loss, and wishing you a peaceful Christmas xx

  5. Sorry to read your news and sending positive thoughts your way :-) Have a great time at the wedding and enjoy the films too - I'm looking forward to seeing Snoopy too xxx

  6. That's very sad news, Gisela, I'm so sorry. Yes, you've had a tough year alright, and I don't think it's fair for anyone (including you) to expect that you can withstand lots of stress, worry and sadness without it taking its toll. But there will still be things to enjoy - films, friends, family, and a wedding too. Sending love. xxx

  7. Oh, I've just seen this - stupid over-long blog roll! You have had a terrible year, haven't you? I hope Himself is going to be okay. We went through something very similar earlier this year, and it is really awful. You start out doing things that have to be done, and after that life carries on but you keep stumbling into the hole that's been left there.

    It's okay to yell, "I'm not coping now." And don't feel you have to 'get over it' too quickly; I know my Pete felt everyone expected him to be all right after a couple of months and it wasn't. If things aren't all right, that's normal.

  8. Sorry to hear your news lovely and sorry I didn't get to your post sooner. It has been so crap for you in 2015 but I hope that next year is better with loads to look forward to. Just let Christmas come and go if it doesn't feel right. There's always next year.And when we meet up next, the cakes are on me. Lots of love.xxxxx

  9. That's a lot of sad news there Gisela, I'm so sorry to hear what you've been through. You're right, the burden of looking out for everyone else can get very heavy sometimes. Take a bit of time to look after yourself, it's really important. Xxx